Kakasaku week day 1: Secret
by kakashoot
Summary: Kakashi stumbles upon a journal filled with personal information, almost all of which regarding him. Who does the journal belong to? Perhaps, it's a secret? Kakasaku oneshot !


**A/N:**

For kakasaku week on tumblr. Wow ok this took me forever to write because as I was trying to do this I was also graduating from high school, working, and having a social life, so please don't kill me if this is filled with errors. Also this story is very forced and rushed, again, because of time restraints. I'm posting this at 12:42 am so technically it's already day 2...sigh..

There's a link to my main blog in my about..or whatever..since I wiped this account of my old fics. the url is k-akashi

anyway here it is

* * *

In all honesty, Kakashi hated grocery shopping. He hated it for many reasons, but the forced social interaction that resulted from visiting the grocery store was what ultimately made him give up the exasperating task (sadly). In some way or another he always ended up sourly shuffling through the isles to avoid familiar faces, only to bump into one around the very corner he was trying to curve about to (hopefully) escape. Familiar faces never let an unoccupied ninja stroll by without throwing some task or heart wrenching plea in their direction.

But in the previous weeks the Hokage had tripled Kakashi's work load, using him on almost any mission above a C rank, since the war there was no time to forsake caution. He couldn't blame her for that. During his days off, he mostly slept in a comatose state, and woke up hungry enough to eat the paint off his walls, which more or less explained his current situation.

With a sigh loud enough to ward off any acquaintance within a hundred yard radius, Kakashi grabbed a carton of milk and added it to his current collection of life necessities in his shopping basket. He hadn't seen the mop of bubble gum pink hair in front of him when he turned and began to stride towards the registers, resulting in the pink haired girl to stumble back and drop her purse, spilling its contents all over the stained white tile of the store, along with all of Kakashi's selected grocery items. Before he could rudely grunt in the direction of the obstacle that spilled his groceries, his brain finally registered pink hair and paris green eyes.

"Maybe next time, watch where you're going, okay Sakura-chan?" Kakashi's smile was as sweet as syrup but underneath was just a little bit of cyanide, and Sakura laughed at that.

"Same to you Kakashi. Maybe an old man like you should get his eyes checked" Her smile lacked sweetness but was only coated in cyanide, which allowed Kakashi to grin. As her nimble fingers were busy brushing stray hair from her eyes, Kakashi reached down and bundled his belongings and dumped them back into his basket, figuring a capable woman like Sakura could restuff a few items back into her purse. Or perhaps because he didn't feel right picking up her spilled tampons. He decided the first option would make the best excuse if he were ever asked. Ruffling her hair with his gloved hand, Kakashi shambled past her and made his way toward the registers.

"I'll see you around Sakura, It was nice catching up!" As he walked away he could only chuckle at her exaggerated groans and he was positive she was making a pouting face at the back of his head. That same face she knew he couldn't resist. Kakashi had grown fond of Sakura in the past three years or so, often being paired with her on many missions, but he realized he not only enjoyed her company but highly respected her ability as a kunoichi. In fact, often times he found himself specifically searching for her name on the mission rosters, or requesting her specifically on his own missions, claiming she was the second best medic-nin in the village and their past mission reports prove they work well together (which wasn't false). The mortality rate in their squads were zero thanks to her.

In the time since the war, Sasuke had become, more or less, a nomad, never staying too long in one spot, only coming into the village when he needed to. He only ever needed to because a certain blonde ninja requested it. Naruto continued with missions and in a few weeks will start in anbu (against Kakashi's will). Sakura had become a renowned medic-nin, regularly being requested in other villages for aid with a medical procedure or advice when devising an antidote. Sakura had also turned 20. Kakashi had realized that Sakura had the most beautiful eyes he'd gazed into and her jokes were actually pretty funny (but he never told her that). He had grown to love her hair, her smile and just the sound of her voice, but he kept his opinions to himself since not even he could understand his thoughts or feelings. Actually, he denied calling them feelings for he figured perhaps he was going through a phase or some sick temporary infatuation with the girl. Even still, Kakashi couldn't give up his reoccurring fantasy of Sakura touching him with her gentle hands and the sound of his name dripping from her lips and the feeling of her when she arches into him and presses her soft sweet form against his scarred rough one and then he would slowly take his calloused hand and reach between her-

"Sir…this book isn't for sale, you gave me your journal on accident" Kakashi inhaled sharply and reached a shaky hand to accept the book bound in dulled red leather being returned by the cashier. It wasn't his, but he figured accepting the book would allow him to escape without any qualms.

"Oh... thank you…so sorry about that! Have a nice night" his empty hand was rubbing the back of his neck, successfully playing up the oh-goodness-how-clumsy-of-me persona.

As he mindlessly wandered through the streets with his just-enough-to-survive grocery haul, Kakashi reached a large hand into his back pocket and searched for Icha Icha, as per usual. He was almost startled when his fingertip traced across rough leather until he remembered the girl from the grocery store. Pulling the small worn book out he allowed his eyes to graze across the cover, only for the first time to notice the word "Journal" scrawled over the bumps of leather in cursive handwriting.

"Well…now I'm curious" Kakashi smirked. Sliding a finger along the inside cover he slowly allowed the heavy leather material open on itself, revealing its owner's writing. Only Kakashi was startled to find his own name in the journal. He didn't know who the item belonged to and he didn't believe it was some sort of prank either, but he assumed coincidence. Kakashi began the first line and swallowed hard, preparing himself for whatever information in this book that was somehow linked to him.

_5/14_

_Journal,_

_I bumped into Kakashi today for the first time in a few months, perhaps even since the war. He seems the same, still an emotionless jerk. Ok, maybe he's not emotionless but C'mon…_

_Anyway, we're going on a mission together in a few days, it'll be the first time in a long while that we'll be alone, maybe we'll catch up and he can teach me a few things. Probably not. I'll let you know how it goes. _

So far it just seemed like a personal journal for quick thoughts, maybe to keep track of life. It wasn't unusual for ninja to keep a personal journal, hell it often kept ninja sane. Kakashi flipped a few pages and started up on a new page. Hopefully as time went on things became a little more exciting.

_6/4_

_Journal,_

_I don't have long to write. I'm on a 's been a while since I've seen everyone. Especially him. Talk later. _

"Apparently not. " Kakashi huffed and thumbed through the next few pages.

_6/15_

_Journal,_

_I think I have feelings for Kakashi. It seems a little odd but for some reason I can't help myself. He's been in my dreams too…as of now they're pretty mundane but he's the first man to ever be in my dreams…not even…_

The name that followed was scratched out, so hard that a small hole was ripped in the page. Kakashi ran his fingers over the dark ink patch and continued.

_Regardless, lately I catch myself just wanting to be near him, to just see his mess of hair floating along with the river of people in the village. Anything to make the ache go away. I can't tell anyone about this; so it has to remain my __**secret.**__ Well…ours I guess. _

Kakashi's eyes slid shut as he flopped onto his old couch; exhaustion was nibbling away at his body and he had to sleep, but all he could imagine was his name written in pink sparkly gel ink. With that, he opened the journal once more.

_7/24 _

_Journal, _

_My dreams have become a little….what did I say last? Mundane? Well they're definitely less mundane now. Tsunade-sama said dreams with sex are called wet dreams, so I've been having those. Of course they involve Kakashi, but I feel much less awkward about how I feel now. I don't think he feels it too but ..these...feelings...aren't going away so I have to be ok with this. I really have no choice. Lately whenever he touches me it feels like electricity is shooting from his skin to mine. When I move away because I don't want him to see how flustered I am, I see the disappointed look ghost through his eyes. I'm a bad friend I think. But even after I move I can feel the weight of his hand where he had previously placed it. Usually I can feel it well through the night and when it finally disappears all I want is to feel it again. I just want him to touch me. Like in my dreams. That would be nice. But it's a dream._

_8/29_

_Journal, _

_I love him. Maybe I'll tell him. I know he comes home from a mission soon. I'm not sure yet. I don't know how much longer I can keep this secret. _

When Kakashi finally awoke his nose was still buried in the journal which now rested on his face. He managed to read all of its contents in the duration of the night, but this feat only came at the hand of sacrifice for he had completely forgo his mission report which was due in roughly an hour. He considered the sacrifice worth it.

Before he could react, he once again was colliding with another body, but this time it was him who took the tumble. Using a hand to shield the sun from his eyes, he squinted up at the body above him, who was staring in dismay at her spilled books all over the ground. Kakashi just wanted to make it to the hokage tower, deliver his report, and then get back to the journal. Maybe reread it again.

"Kakashi…are you doing this on purpose? Do you purposely spill my belongings in public places to make me look foolish? I bet that's it. Jeez." He could hear the laughter in her voice as he sat up from his laying position, brushing the dirt from his hair with one hand. This situation must have looked foolish to any eye other than Sakura's and his own. The famous copy-nin sprawled out in the village streets, surrounded by books, and being scolded by a woman with hair just as abnormal as his. Her belongings were all in his reach and by the look of her crossed arms and tapping foot she had no intentions to pick them up herself. Grunting, Kakashi threw her books in her direction, expecting her to catch them all, and she did with ease. After Kakashi stood he noticed he'd forgotten her pen, leaning over he picked it up and stared at it.

"You know what. For knocking me over, I'm taking this pen as hostage, thank you. I was seriously traumatized and I shall be taking this as an apology." Before Kakashi could smirk, the pen was ripped from his large hand and all he could do was staring at Sakura's backside as she turned on her heel and sashayed away from him.

"Whatever Kakashi! Tsunade-sama is expecting your report, so I suggest you stop running into innocent girls and hurry to the hokage tower!" The back of her hand waved him goodbye and Kakashi decided to take her advice. Standing now, he shoved his gloved hands into his pockets and ambled towards his unfavorable destination.

It was not until late that afternoon did he remember the pen he handed back to Sakura was a pink sparkly gel pen, an exact match to a journal he had recently read.


End file.
